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WELCOME
TO THE LORDS PORES

Clean your Skin to Absolve your Sin

About Section

ABOUT US

Our signature item

The Wood Board Facial

Featured in Hollywood!

The wait is over! You can now join hundreds of our followers with a license to perform our signature facial 'The Wood Board Facial.'  

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Featuring the finest sustainably sourced wood from exotic forests across the Pacific Northwest, our propriety wood coating provides the ideal density and surface for our proprietary facial technique.

 

Additionally, every facial comes with a complimentary email newsletter subscription to 130 various right-wing religious websites. For more information, click below.
 

Recommended Pricing

With a low product cost of just $5 per board this facial can generate more ROI than any of your existing facials.

50 min

$185 MSRP

$5 CPT

360% ROI!!

80 min

$260 MSRP

$5 CPT

520% ROI!!

Image by Sergio Capuzzimati

What you get

  • A license to use our name in your marketing materials

  • Detailed proprietary protocols for both 50 minute and 80 minute Wooden Board Facials. 

  • Access to some of the worlds finest wooden boards at the bargain price of just $5 per board (tax and shipping not included)

  • Exclusivity within a 5 mile radius (or 12 minute drive time)

  • An iron-clad indemnification agreement

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Normally priced at just $666!

Spring sale priced at $395!

Are you ready to see your profits soar into the heavens?

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